umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
