I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
