not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Alive.
So much puke
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Randomize
