well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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