who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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