ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
