i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize
