So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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