At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
Randomize
