So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Can I color on your dick again?
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Randomize
