So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
