I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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