Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
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