advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
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