So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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