4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
