oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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