Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Did you just see the Batmobile???
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
My ass is underappreciated
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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