Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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