Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Randomize