I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
he quoted the bible to break up with me
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
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