she smelled like a LAN party
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
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