So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I still have a little drunk in my system
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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