ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Ketchup is God's man juice
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
You left your phone here
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