Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
kristin has been a bad kristin
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
