I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Randomize
