i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
