i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Randomize
