when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
