Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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