New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
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