Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
