you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I smell stomach acid.
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Randomize
