i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser