Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
