I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
that is very illegal...i love you.
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