I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
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