If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
