You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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