either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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