hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
I think i got beer on your cat.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
Randomize
