Nicole vs. Life
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
