omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
