Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Randomize
