My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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