fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
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