Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
