There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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