Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Randomize
