I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Acid is not a monday night drug
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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